Skipping

Stagnancy has never been something I enjoy. I don't enjoy sitting still, I don't enjoy repetition, it's not me. So why am I giving in now? Why am I waiting for Rachel to come back when she probably won't anytime soon if ever? Waiting is over. It's not good for me and only leads to more pain when I find out each day how much better off she is because I'm not there. I will never mean as much as her friends and that's how it is. They make her happy and I do occasionally, but usually am a nuisance due to my mental health. I will limit my exposure to her as she seems to enjoy that. While not quite the end yet, it seems to get closer each day.

I'm starting to feel 
We stay together out of fear 
Of dying alone

I've been slipping through the years
My old clothes don't fit like they once did
So they hang like ghosts of the people I have been

It's like my heart can't be tamed
And I fall in love every day
And I feel like a fool

I have to face the truth
That no one could ever look at me like you do
Like I'm something worth holding onto

There's times I think of leaving
But it's something I'll never do
Because you can do better than me
But I can't do better than you